Ahh, the proboscis monkey. Perhaps better known as the easier-to-pronounce “monkey with the penis nose.”

An entire simian order of Cyrano de Bergeracs.

After an exciting 24 hours spotting wildlife at the Kinabatangan River, I’ve arrived at (okay, hitchhiked to, but don’t freak out Mom) Labuk Bay Sanctuary, about 20 miles west of Sandakan.

Real quick, here’s the hitchhiking story. I’d never tried it before and really wanted to during my RTW travels, somewhere safe like New Zealand. And I’d go with a fellow traveler because, you know, safety in numbers. But the opportunity never arose during my time there, or in Australia, and then suddenly I’m in Asia and worried my hitchhiking chance has passed. But on the way back from the Kinabatangan River to Sandakan, we drive by the turn off for Labuk Bay and it’s my only chance to stop here… so I ask to get out at that intersection, which is still about 9 miles from the sanctuary. The next feeding is in 30 minutes so I don’t have enough time to walk there. There are no cabs. My only hope is that a kind soul driving to the sanctuary will pick me up.

Five minutes later, the third car to pass by pulls over. It’s a young local couple and they’re concerned about me: “Are you okay? Do you need help?” I had foregone the thumb-out international sign for hitchhiking in favor of simply flagging down a car, which apparently causes worry. I explain that I’m just trying to get to the proboscis monkey feeding in 30 minutes and need a ride. The girl says she works as a receptionist at the hotel there and would be happy to drop me off. In fact, even though her shift starts in a few minutes, she asks her boyfriend to bring me to the platform first and then shows me the counter where I can buy a ticket (60MYR / $18 USD) and camera permit (10MYR / $3 USD). This couple could not be kinder or more helpful. I try to give cash to the guy driving the car, even just for gas, but he refuses. At this point I internally pat myself on the back for have successfully hitchhiked, since if I’d paid him it would have only been a quasi-hitchhike. Success!

I feel the need end this hitchhiking story by pointing out that I would not have gotten into a sketchy car.

Unplanned, I hitchhike again the next day. I’m not intending to, but on my way to the bus station near Sepilok, a minivan with two men and three little kids playing on iPads pulls over to ask if I need a ride. Apparently a single blonde female walking along the side of the road concerns people here! They kindly drop me off in town and save me a bus ride. We all hit it off and we’re now friends on Facebook. Don’t worry, I kick my newly developed hitchhiking habit after that.

Back to the penis monkeys.

This is Platform B (there are only two platforms, a few kilometers apart) at the 11:30am feeding.

As if on cue, a slew of proboscis monkeys arrive. Like any crew member in Hollywood, these guys know what time to show up for free food… even if in this case craft services is only fruit.

There are a few raised platforms around the viewing area. Fruit is distributed on each one.

These proboscis monkeys live in the wild and typically eat leaves so this fruit is intended to supplement their diet.

Given the large and phallic nature of their noses, you might be curious how these creatures measure up below the waist.

I’ve mostly angled these shots to avoid that region, as there are erect penises (and plenty of proboscis fornication) everywhere. The rest of these photos are rated G.

After around 30 minutes the fruit is gone and monkeys scatter off into the wild.

We also see several Great Hornbill birds flying around the area. We spotted them on the Kinabatangan River, but I’m still not used to that double-beak illusion (the top one is really a casque, which acts as a helmet). This particular kind is the Oriental Pied Hornbill.

Here’s a shot of my lunch, a tasty noodle and veggie dish with lemon iced tea:

Later that afternoon I show up at Platform A for the next feeding.

This adult male emits a loud bellow in the photo below:

A note about transportation:

There is a shuttle bus that departs Sandakan in the morning, arrives at Sepilok (the nearby orangutan sanctuary) for the morning feeding, then transfers guests nearby to Labuk Bay for the afternoon feeding, and returns to Sandakan at the end of the day. It’s only 15MYR ($5 USD) each way to join this “tour” and I catch up to them around lunchtime and stick with them all the way back to Sandakan. From what I gather this is the most economical way to get to Labuk Bay and back. And you can see Sepilok this way too! Great deal.

Here’s the area in detail:

And Labuk Bay, in greater detail:

[images via]

And as part of this tour, guests are shown a 50-minute documentary (from 2003) about the proboscis monkeys in this area. I LOVE IT SO MUCH.

It’s called The Biggest Nose in Borneo and here’s a synopsis:

In the mangrove forests of Borneo, having a big nose is the route to success for male proboscis monkeys. It is the highway to a female’s heart.

A truly successful proboscis, however, also needs a nose for opportunity…

This story follows the adventures of two male monkeys. Alistair is the alpha male, the Big Nose in this forest, with 22 wives. He tries to hang onto his empire but Bill, a young upstart, challenges him for his kingdom – or at least a few of his females.

All is thrown into crisis, however, with the advent of two unforeseen disasters. First, a lengthy drought robs the monkeys of food and water, and then foresters arrive, intending to turn their forest home into an oil palm plantation.

Their struggle to survive these twin disasters tests the monkeys like never before. It’s an ordeal that provides an extraordinary insight into their lives, revealing a sharp intelligence and, eventually, an ability to adapt to a changing world.

The documentary follows these monkeys for months and their lives are not unlike those depicted on a soap opera — bachelor Bill tries to steal away one of Alistair’s wives and take over the tribe. The narrator delivers cheesy lines like, “Bill has to decide if he’s a lover or a fighter.”

I can’t find it on-line for free (although if you do, please let me know and I’ll update it here). But here’s the link to watch it for $3.99 on Amazon. Totally worth it. (Not a referral link.)

I am so glad I got to see these monkeys up close. Tomorrow I’ll detail my visit to nearby Sepilok Sanctuary to watch the orangutans!